my Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- bingo equals death Holy crap. So as a favour to my sick mother, I worked a bingo for her this evening. My little brother plays hockey, and to help subsidize the cost of playing, each parent is required to 'volunteer' for a certain number of bingoes. I fucking hate bingo. Classy people do not play bingo. The people who play bingo are expectant mothers who light their next cigarrette with the butt of their old one and gradmamas who cannot breathe in deaply for fear of disloging the tumors that grow in their lungs and it seems that haute couture at bingo is vinyl and cheetah print. I didn't think it was actually true until I saw it close up and personal. Scariest. Moment. Ever. SO I'm pushing the cart of coffee(tar?), pop and chips around and this old man whistles at me (I'm so glad he realized that as a dog, a simple "excuse me" would OBVIOUSLY not sufficed for attracting my attention) and then asks for a cup of coffee. I plaster on my "look-at-how-vapid-I-am" smile and ask him how he took his coffee. He looks (leers?) up at me and says "just like my women, hot and creamy". Of course it was at this point that I ruptured my kidney laughing so hard at his delightful wit. Only not. Icky creepy old men. And then there are the OBESE (I don't use that word lightly...I truly mean OBESE) women who take their 500mL (two cups for those who like the dumb way) coffee with FOUR creams AND FOUR sugars. I almost told this lady to fuck the coffee as it's obviously just a transport method for the fat. Why don't you just snort the sugar and chase it down with cream? I mean, whatever if your big, but who the fuck needs four cream and sugar with their joe? Obviously they don't like coffee, so just stick wit friggin pop, or waitaminnut! WATER! Honestly...I never realized how white trash my community was until tonight. Again with the Scariest.Moment.Ever. And in keeping with the theme of whinging and whining **(could someone please tell me if I'm using the same word but just spelling it british?)** 11:15 p.m. - 2005-05-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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